Distractions aren’t the problem. [🐝U]

If this year didn’t go the way you hoped, you’re probably telling yourself 1 of 2 stories:

“I didn’t do enough.”
or
“Maybe this just isn’t for me.”

Neither tells the whole truth
& both keep you quietly spinning your wheels

Because most of the people I talk to aren’t avoiding their business.
They’re working on it … constantly.

But effort without direction still leaves you exhausted.

The problem isn’t always effort (or lack of it)
It’s usually where that effort keeps getting redirected.

Why “Just Remove Distractions” Never Works

We love blaming external things for getting distracted:
maybe it’s notifications on our phones
so we turn them off

But we still catch ourselves doom-scrolling social media
so we move the phone out of reach

Then we:
→ start scrolling on our computer
→ “just quickly check” email
→ or maybe remember laundry

… & a thousand tiny tasks that feel urgent

Removing tech doesn’t remove distraction.
It just forces distraction to get more creative.

Because it isn’t about the device or the environment.
Distraction usually shows up when something feels emotionally unsafe … or uncertain.

& that’s why some of the most dangerous distractions don’t look like distractions at all.

When Distractions Pretend to Be Responsibility

Some distractions don’t look or feel like avoidance at all.

They seem responsible.
→ working on your website again instead of pitching
→ refining your offer instead of testing it
→ organizing notes instead of making a decision
→ doing more “research” or taking another program before you act

You think you’re doing the right things
but not everything works for everyone
& even if it did, they still need to be done at the right time

not just when it feels “easy” or “convenient.”

Distraction Isn’t a Character Flaw

Distraction isn’t about laziness or lack of ambition or motivation.

Sure, it’s not healthy,
but it is an understandable escape from reality.

If a behavior once helped you feel better,
your brain’s going to keep offering it as a solution.

Not because it’s effective
But because it’s familiar.

Once you see this pattern, you start noticing it everywhere
not just in work, but in the habits we use to stay quiet, small, or safe.

When I was younger, I bit my nails … a lot
(I know it’s not work-related … stick with me)

It was so bad they’d often bleed
took me until I was well into adulthood to stop
not because I liked having finger tips that looked like they went through a blender

Turns out I used to bite my nails only in certain situations
When I wanted to say something but felt I couldn’t
so instead of speaking, I literally stayed quiet by biting my nails

I was raised in a culture where women didn't have a voice
You were dressed up & cared for family or guests
& not doing as you were told meant with more than stern words & a time out

My nail-biting wasn’t the problem.
Silence was.

Anything that stops discomfort can become a habit.
Awareness is what makes it optional.

What Nail-Biting Taught Me About Distraction

I wish I could say I’ve been “enlightened” since I was a child
Or even that I had an a-ha moment & that things have been perfect ever since.

This model from Nir Eyal’s book Indistractible helped me understand why “just remove distractions” never worked.

& I realized you don’t just “outgrow” nail biting habits
But you do find your voice

& I do still catch myself biting my nails or picking at them
when I have something to say but feel I shouldn’t
or struggle for the “right” way to say things to not piss off the “authority figures.”

Because distraction isn’t a failure of discipline.
It’s feedback.

Here’s where things finally clicked for me.

Every distraction starts with a trigger
& that trigger determines if we move toward what we want
or away from it.

The Same Trigger Can Send You in Opposite Directions

Triggers don’t decide our fate.
They just prompt action.

The same moment of discomfort can send us in opposite directions:
→ toward traction … actions that move us closer to what we want
→ or toward distraction … actions that help us escape how we feel

Feeling uncertain about prospecting? or just putting yourself “out there”?

That internal trigger can lead to:
→ traction: talking to people
→ distraction: rehearsing scripts or researching “one more thing/name/etc”

If you pause, even for a second, think about why
What’s the trigger behind your most common distraction?

Discomfort is the Price for Momentum

The wrong things aren’t always obvious.

Often, they’re the things that help us escape discomfort:
→ uncertainty
→ fear of being seen
→ fear of wasting effort
→ fear that the result won’t justify the energy

& that list is longer than any of us want to admit.

The closer a task gets to real momentum (visibility, money, commitment)
The louder our discomfort gets.

Time Management Is Pain Management

We don’t avoid tasks because we don’t “have time”.
We avoid them because they create internal friction.

That’s why time management is really pain management.

If a task brings up doubt, vulnerability, or risk,
your brain will find something “safer” to do … even if it doesn’t help you achieve your goals.

That’s how a year fills up with lots of motion
but no momentum.

Things start changing when you start seeing it.
& when you do, it gets harder to ignore

Why This Feels Worse at the End of the Year

At the end of the year, discomfort is everywhere.

Unmet goals.
Comparison to others being more successful.
Questions about whether this path is still worth it.

Distractions multiply
the emotional load from the time of year is heavier,
& your time is being pulled in more directions than usual.

Planned Waste vs Accidental Drift

This doesn’t mean you can’t binge Netflix or scroll social media.

Time you plan to waste is not wasted time.
Rest, escape, & enjoyment are necessary.

The problem is unplanned distraction …
the kind that sneaks in when something important feels uncomfortable.

Distractions Get Loud When Purpose Gets Quiet

There’s another layer to this that most productivity advice skips.

Sometimes, it’s not that we’re avoiding the work.
It’s that we’re not deeply anchored to why the work matters right now.

In Think & Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill called this “definiteness of purpose.”
Not a vague goal or a someday dream.

A clear, emotionally grounded reason for doing this work
right now
especially when it’s uncomfortable.

Your reason TO do it has to be stronger than the excuse (distraction) not to.

The Difference Between a Reason & an Excuse

A reason tells the truth about reality.
An excuse protects us from discomfort.

Both sound responsible.
The difference is what they do next.

Imagine you get a call that your child/parent/spouse got rushed to the hospital
on a scale of 1 to 10, getting there ASAP is going to be a 10

But you don’t have a car, there’s construction that detours traffic, & it’s near blizzard conditions …

Are any of those valid obstacles keeping you from going?
Or is the reason TO stronger than an excuse not to find a way to that emergency room?

Excuses rarely feel dishonest in the moment.
Especially when you don’t have that “definiteness of purpose”
They feel like distractions that make sense.

That’s a big reason I ask about “who you want to serve & why” on coaching calls
Because when it’s about the what & how,
you can end up “a vegan working for a dairy farm”

Now imagine the avalanche of distractions that are going to come up in that scenario
It can literally bury you alive & kill your business

Because no productivity hack makes up for misalignment.

Persistence doesn’t come from willpower.
It comes from your desire.
& that desire fades fast when the purpose is abstract, inherited, or outdated.

So the brain looks for relief & you’re more willing to go along for the ride.

What Helps … Without Turning You Into a Robot

Removing external triggers does help … a bit

I’m usually more productive when I’m “camping”
because I’m limited on the amount of power I have to run my Starlink & charge my laptop

That doesn’t make it a foolproof plan

But when the planning & tasks are paired with intention
It cuts back a lot of the mental negotiation that leads us off track

That’s where pacts & accountability come in.

Small agreements you make with yourself:
→ what you’re working on … the next step you need vs the 10th that feels “easier”
→ when you’ll start … & stop
→ & what “done for today” actually means (when you plan it out) instead of trying to cram it all into 1 day

If this year felt heavy, exhausting, or disappointing …
it doesn’t mean you failed.

There is no failure … only feedback

It might just mean your energy was being spent protecting you from discomfort
instead of moving you toward what you want.

& that’s something you can change … without changing who you are.

Awareness doesn’t eliminate distraction.
It gives you your choice back.

& THAT changes everything.

Take a moment to notice what’s been distracting you
& what it’s been protecting you from.

How clear is your reason for doing this work right now?

Write it all down.
Awareness changes the game.

& if having accountability helps, I’m easy to find.

Make it a great “indistractible“ New Year!
EG

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